Have you ever started a new project, wanted to start a business, begun a brand new course of study, or jumped through a significant hurdle in your path?

You feel the excitement of the first few days or weeks, and then the next stage is a blur because - you’re experiencing that all-consuming emotion - FEAR.

Our fears chase each of us at different times and with varying intensity.

That trepidation about how things will turn out or how a situation will affect your life is a natural consequence of being human. Fear comes up at every stage, twist & turn and the very threshold of breakthroughs. So, how does one navigate this strong emotion without being completely overwhelmed by it?

My understanding of fear changed when I read ‘Playing Big’ by Tara Mohr. Her book is one of those special ones, a beacon and a lighthouse, created with so much wisdom and care. I usually was great with things that I knew would happen; when chaos brought challenges but the expected ones? the things that came as a surprise always seemed to knock the wind out of my sails, leaving me feeling nauseous and unmotivated.

When I came across the chapter in Playing Big, a light went off in my brain; something about the words that Tara wrote made so much sense to me.

Here’s the first thing that I earmarked:

“The Hebrew Bible used two different words for fear. The first one is pachad - the fear of projected or imagined things.
It’s the irrational fear that stems from imagining the worst-case scenario about something.”

This kind of fear was the kind that showed up in a way similar to when you’re in fight or flight mode, your adrenaline flying high while you’re either figuring out what to do to remove yourself from a particular situation or find a solution immediately. Whatever the reason is, it’s easy to get sidetracked entirely and stop pursuing the goal you were going for in the first place. Sometimes, this could be a rash opinion handed to you, or someone blatantly disrespecting or underestimating you - or, you screwed up doing an important task.

Yirah is the name given for the other fear - the awe-inspiring one. She explains it in this way:

“It is the feeling that overcomes us when we inhabit a larger space than we are used to
It is the feeling we experience when we suddenly come into possession of considerably more energy than we had before
It is what we feel in the presence of the divine”

I think of this as ‘expansive fear’ - fear that makes you one with the infinite and gives you that ‘goosebumps all over’ feeling. It inspires AWE and uncertainty so immense that it might feel like fear, but it’s the kind that signifies the beginning of something unprecedented, something special.

So how to move past these emotions when all you want to do is hide in bed or stay on the couch watching reruns of your favourite show?

Stand firm in your strength

Not everything in life goes our way, and bumps in the road are part of the deal. They’re there to equip us with the skills to make it. If everything were easy, it wouldn’t be as motivating to pursue it and succeed.

Remember that this is a moment in time - a passing phase.

It’s easy to forget that everything passes, including the scariest and most depressing moments. When life throws you a punch, let it be one where you hold the awareness of it being a transitory phase and not something that you have to hold on to forever.

Breathe; it’s ok to feel what you’re feeling.

Yep. Feel all the feelings; let them pass through you. If you observe yourself, you’ll find that they pass by quicker than you imagine. We tend to hold on to scary moments long after they’ve passed. Being present and aware is sometimes all you need to ground yourself in the NOW.